TENTATIVE AGENDA FOR THE MONDAY NIGHT KZYX BOARD MEETING at the Fort Bragg Senior Center:
1. CALL TO ORDER. Initial Hosannahs and 8-1 declaration that GM Coate is in charge of the meeting and the station.
2. ROLL CALL, not counting Mr. Sakowicz.
3. APPROVE MINUTES (OF PREVIOUS MEETING). Making sure that any criticism of station management is excised.
4. ANNOUNCEMENTS/ STATUS REPORTS (Board President): Declarations, pronouncements, testimonials, and other tributes to our sagacious management.
5. MATTERS FROM BOARD MEMBERS except for Mr. Sakowicz.
6. GENERAL MANAGER’S REPORT: Summary: I'm doing a great job, and I thank the fat ladies, er, my trustees, for their ongoing support.
7. PUBLIC COMMENT (3 minute time limited to one speaker who cannot be any of the 200 people on the attached enemies list: Call the station in Philo for latest version. (Hint: If in doubt, you’re on it.)
8. ACTION ITEMS - NONE. We cannot improve on perfection.
9. DISCUSSION MATTERS. How I'm Doing A Great Job by GM Coate.
A. CODE OF RESPONSIBILITIES FOR BOARD MEMBERS. 1. No contact with AVA. 2. No contact with AVA. 3. No contact with AVA. 4. No contact with McKenty, Tracy, Collins, Bosk, Clogg, McClean et al and the other communists and miscellaneous undesirables and malcontents.
B. IMPROVED MEETING PROTOCOLS. Final approval of list of people not allowed to speak based on what they said tonight. Any agreement with dissidents -- including nodding, smiling, mm-hmming, winking, etc., — will be grounds for immediate addition to Mr. Coate's “improved protocols” list. List moderator: Mary Aigner.
10. OTHER BUSINESS. Elimination of Sakowicz.
11. SET DATE FOR NEXT MEETING, 2020.