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Valley People

“JOHN SCHARFFENBERGER: A Man and His Garden.” is the theme for a fundraiser for the local Ambulance Service. Scharffie's splendid Philo acres have been featured in Martha Stewart Living, Garden Design magazine and the SF Chronicle among other wowed! publications, and is well-worth seeing, especially for a cause this good, which is our very own meat wagon, the Anderson Valley Ambulance. Mark down Saturday, May 22 from 1-5pm. The “small plate pairings with local wines” at $40/person come with the price of admission, but sales are limited to 200 tickets so get in now while the getting is good. Checks should be payable to AVAS and sent to Ginger Valen, President, AVAS, POB 222, Boonville, CA 95415. Make certain to include your return address. For more information call Ginger Valen at 707-895-9424.

“IF YOU DON’T HAVE a census form, and it sounds like most people in the Valley don’t, they can be picked up at Lemons, AV Market and Pic-N-Pay between now and April 19th. Why bother? If there were a better count of how many people live in Anderson Valley, the Health Center might be able to get Federal funding to make up for the State funding it lost. Also, if you mail the form in, no one will try to find your house to collect the information on the form.” — Diane Paget

BARBARA JOHANNAH reports that her husband, Dave Broadbent, is at last back at his Holmes Ranch home after a long medical ordeal, during which his esophagus was removed. The esophagus being a rather crucial piece of human equipment, Dave, always a fighter, now begins the fight of his life as his body and his doctors compensate for its loss.

THE PRETTY young woman had been sweet on the handsome young man since they were at Anderson Valley Elementary together. But, as grandmothers often remind their granddaughters, handsome is as handsome does, and when the handsome young man suddenly struck the pretty young woman for all to see he revealed himself for what he is, and she has left him, left him, everyone hopes, for good.

LATEST RUMOR has the Boonville Lodge, empty since being driven out of business months ago by a radical increase in rent on top of a generally onerous lease by the building owner, becoming a Mexican Cantina along the lines, perhaps, of Mary Jane's old Cantina where Lauren's Restaurant now thrives.

IF OUR SCHOOL PEOPLE hope to pass that $18-plus million bond issue they better start pushing for it. Absentee ballots go out in a month —and more people vote absentee all the time — but the issue is so far just about invisible. Property taxes are a tough sell in the best of times, and these aren't the best of times. This one, technically called an “assessment,” needs 55% of the vote to pass. As one local lady put it, “The School Bond is a little bit of a prickly subject with everyone. I agree that the school is in bad shape, but I also feel that a lot of the work that needs done is due to lack of maintenance. If it would've been taken care of when it was a small problem, it wouldn't be such a big problem now. I'm really having a hard time with this one. But then again, there are so many facets of the school that I have problems with that I don't know where to start.”

THE OTHER DAY, I noticed my colleague, The Major, intently filling out an application form for a seat on the oversight board that will monitor the school district's spending of the bond money, a clear case of cart-before-the-horse it seemed to me since we haven't even had the election yet. I couldn't help remarking to him, “Your chances of being selected for any responsibility having to do with the local school district, Major, ranges from zero to non-existent. They even sent me one of those forms, which means they literally went out to everyone.” The Major went on writing. “They asked me to judge a Science Fair once, didn't they?” he said, awing me with his optimism. (The Major is showing his age these days and completely forgot about the Science Fair. “I thought it was next week,” he lamely claimed.)

MR. AND MRS. ED JEWETT and family left Saturday for Anderson Valley where they will visit her mother, Mrs. Charles Hulburg of “The Oaks.” This visit, the record of which was culled from the archive of the Fort Bragg Advocate, occurred in 1910. A family named Jewett went on to amass quite a large timber fortune; their descendants prosper still in San Francisco. Mrs. Charles Hulburg? The Oaks? A hundred years later we're reminded how quickly and thoroughly every thing has changed in The Anderson Valley.

JUDY ISBELL of Navarro is also at last recuperating at home after corrective leg surgery.

PRESIDENTIAL TREATMENT: AVHS grad Zack Anderson co-wrote the award-winning political documentary, “The Fall of Fujimori,” back in 2005. The film was recently screened for a handful of top US generals in Afghanistan to provoke “innovative thinking” amongst the brass. So warm was the reception, in fact, that President Obama, in Kabul yesterday on a surprise visit to the troops, personally asked Anderson's highly placed source for a copy of the movie. Ron Snowden, who taught Anderson U.S. Government at Boonville High, should be proud. The movie is available on Netflix. Zack is presently living in London where he's at work on a movie about soccer.

IT'S BEEN a rough winter for some of us, but very rough for Harold Hulbert who managed to get pneumonia after defeating cancer; Dave Broadbent who has returned home 150 pounds and one whole body part lighter than when he left for the hospital; Matt Lemons who took a bad fall from a suddenly collapsed scaffold; and Judy Isbell who I always assumed was invincible after I watched her lift a king-size bed with one hand while she vacuumed beneath it with the other.

THIS YEAR’S Easter Egg Hunt is this Sunday, April 4, 2010 at 1pm sharp on the Fairgrounds lawn in Boonville. Preschool through fourth grade children. Bring your own basket. Preceding the Easter egg hunt is the annual pancake breakfast in the Fairgrounds dining hall from 8 to 11:30am. $8 for adults and $4 for children under 10. Sponsored by the Anderson Valley Lions Club. All proceeds benefit the Anderson Valley Teen Center. For more information call 895-2928 or 895-2017.

IN ONE of the press releases announcing Moe Mandel's appearance at the Philo Grange this Saturday night, Moe says he remembers as a high school kid that whenever the kids heard about a crank lab blowing up they'd say, “Well, there goes another JV coach.” I'm sure he tells it better than me, but that one made me laugh out loud.

FOUND! A spiffy little digital camera lying undamaged in its black case on the Con Creek Bridge near the Anderson Valley Elementary School. The nice lady who rescued it can be reached at 895-3070.

THE 28TH ANNUAL Boontling Classsic 5k Footrace is on for Sunday, May 2, 10:00 AM starting and finishing at the Anderson Valley Elementary School on Anderson Valley Way. $8 entry fee ($2 discount for North Coast Strider members. T-Shirts: $10. Late Registration Fee: $10. Pre-registration deadline is May 1. Race day registration is 8:30-9:30 am Plaques will be awarded to the top finishing man and woman. Ribbons to the top 3 in each Division. And a big drawing for prizes! Questions? Call Bruce Hering at 707-895-3589 or email

THIS IS NOT intended as an insult, and fess up old timers, but I wonder if I'm the only one in The Valley who thinks the young Janese June was once our very own Sarah Palin? Janese, like Palin, was and, I hasten to add, is, quite attractive and never shy about her political opinions. Back in the Carter Administration when the proto-Fox News types were in a major tiz about the Panama Canal reverting to Panama, Janese said to me, “Do you think we should give it back?” I replied, smugly no doubt, thus further irritating Janese, “Where is the Panama Canal located?” Janese said, “Panama, of course.” I said, “I rest my case.” She said, “I don't know why I even bothered to ask.”

DICK BROWNING WRITES: “Congratulations to the Panther tennis team that shipwrecked the Point Arena Pirates, 5 to 0 yesterday. All of the following players won their matches in straight sets: John Paula, Dylan Beatty and Quinn O'Connell won in singles and Laura Essayah with Domingo Ferreyra and Kristen Andersen with Drake Mezzanatto won in doubles. In a practice match Stella Day and Sydney Frazer narrowly lost in three sets to the top two boys on the Point Arena team. The Panthers are now 5 wins and no losses this season.”

MATT LEMONS is resting at his Boonville home after a scaffold broke beneath him and Matt fell about 20 feet. Which is a long way down even if you're ready for it, and Matt wasn't. The fall destroyed the top of Matt's tibia and generally played heck with his knee. The popular Boonville man had surgery last week, will be in bed for a month, then physical therapy for a year.

SATURDAY, APRIL 24 is the day for the Cops and Robbers Costume Swing Dance from 7-midnight at the Anderson Valley Grange in Philo. The dance is a benefit for KZYX&Z and includes a floor show with a retro Prohibition-era theme plus drinks and food, a raffle and a costume contest. $10 for costumed guests and $13 for non-costumed guests. Tell ’em, Bugsy sent you. Info 895-3842. — Greg Krouse.

WITH OUR VERY OWN Pot Museum starting up in Navarro next door to the Rock Shop, what you might call an irony of proximity accompanies it, which is that just down the road, almost within shouting distance, once lived the Manson Family. The year, I believe, was the pivotal one of 1968. Valley Old Timers will tell you that it was the Manson gang who introduced marijuana to the sporting segment of Valley youth. The “family,” as they called themselves, rented a house on lower Gwschend Road.

THE PHILO Methodist Church will hold a Bake Sale on the porch of Lemon's Market on Saturday, April 3rd, at 10am. A part of the money raised will be contributed to the Deputy Dog Fund to help pay for a trained German shepherd to accompany our local deputy sheriff. There will be huckleberry pies, cookies, tarts, zucchini bread and much more. Pat Hulbert will be hosting the event and she says, “Come early if you want to get a huckleberry pie.”

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