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Accountability for Vargas

This is in response to a post on your Facebook page in regards to the Aaron Vargas case. There are quotes like “If Aaron is allowed to go free, get counseling, and do community service by dedicating his life to educating our public safety officers and the general public, he will have well served his term” or “He should be let go immediately and treated to a parade down Main St.”

I believe these statements show that this community does not value the importance of accountability. Mr. McNeil should have been held accountable and so should Aaron. We have a legal system chalked full of people who are paid good money to deal with situations like this. It was a terrible thing that happened to Aaron, but he went about it the wrong way. It is much harder to do the right thing, in this case reporting the matter and having the legal system handle it, than it is to take the easy way out. Aaron took the easy way out and we should not make it easier. Nor should he be honored in anyway. If he would have handled the situation legally and helped others in similar situations, I would have a great respect for him as a man. I have a hard time respecting a murderer. All of the attention this case has brought I am certain has helped many but, from knowing his family as I do, it was all done for selfish reasons. They could give a crap about anyone else, they are grabbing at straws in an attempt to get this guy free. 

Aaron really shouldn’t have been free at the time that he murdered Mr. McNeil, let alone free now. This should be a respectable community; I am all for helping our fellow members out, but we do have to draw the line somewhere. If we do not, it shows that people can literally get away with murder. We have to put our foot down now, and he should stay right where he is at for a very long time. Think about it; guys get put in jail for drugs longer than 6 years and most of them have never killed anyone. If Aaron goes free, why not let some of the drug dealers go? What about the guy who got the “3 strikes” for weed or intoxication? This is just my two cents. 



  1. Mindy April 11, 2010

    I know which family this letter comes from and what their personal reasons are for calling my efforts to raise awareness about sexual abuse “selflish.” I am not surprised that my credibility is being attacked because that is what abusers do – they attack the credibility of others in this way. If I have “selfish” reasons then why do I sit up late at night responding to letters that I get from sexual abuse victims from all over the world? Why do I spend hour and hours researching these issues and how we can better protect all children from sexual abuse? Why am I in the process of starting a non-profit organization to help victims of sexual abuse. Talk to Todd Rowan, a victim, and try and tell him that the Vargas family has “selfish” reasons for their efforts. He has grown close to me and my family this last year and has worked with us selflessly. My “selfish” efforts have not just been about my brother, it is about all of McNeill’s victims, who I feel are like my brothers too, and everyone else who is a victim. I continue to try and end abuse and will continue to do so after my brother comes home. Maybe you are not informed about Aaron’s case, but his abuser was reported to the police several times and nothing was done. His abuser had him brainwashed into believing that the police would not help. Aaron was in a mental prison for 20 years – Darrell kept him there and Aaron freed himself. Look up Stockholm Syndrome. Read about child sexual abuse. Any person who is educated on these issues understands this situation, including Oprah, who said on camera yesterday that she hopes Aaron will come home. Even the McNeill family supports Aaron. They know Aaron better than most and they understand the situation. I’m sorry that you feel the need to drag down a family who is already going through the most difficult time of their liives, but again, that is what abusers do. I expect to be attacked and criticized by those who don’t wish to be exposed, that is part of ending the silence of abuse. If you even had an ounce of the courage that the victims have, you would at least sign your name to your letter.

    • Susan April 11, 2010

      To the Vargas Family…..I believe the person who wrote this letter doesn’t understand how damaging abuse is on the victims. If “anonymous” did understand they would use there letter writing skills to help victims, not make them feel worse. I’m sorry you had to be subjected to this kind of thing.

    • Robin April 11, 2010

      This person is obviously clueless about the case and the need for actual justice to be served. If the coward who wrote this letter has a personal vendetta against the family then that is a completely different issue and should be discussed in other places and at another time. Unfortunately some people in small towns can never escape from the small town mentality and have to create drama every chance they get no matter how old they are. They wanted attention to be taken away from the important issues at hand, maybe the reality that something like this can happen underneath their noses in their perfect little town is too much for them. Too bad they are too big of cowards to sign their letter, but then again it doesn’t matter. Maybe if something as unfortunate as sexual abuse happened in their own family it suddenly wouldn’t be a selfish thing for you to protect your brother or defend what’s right. They might actually be doing the same thing. Or maybe they’re the type to allow it to continue rather than addressing the issue making more work for them, must be FBPD!

      I hope that Aaron comes home where he belongs and can begin to heal. The damage is done on both sides and there is nothing that can be done about it. Aaron is going to have to live with what he did for the rest of his life and will have to answer for himself when the time comes. None of us should be passing judgement on his choices, regardless of what you may think is right. In this case it wasn’t fair that justice hadn’t been pursued when it would have made a big difference in the lives of many men, about 20 years ago. Aaron is not Darrell’s only victim, that much is clear and Aaron has already paid the ultimate price by being betrayed by those sworn to protect him when they stood by and did nothing. Small town’s make it difficult to do anything, especially stand up for yourself. Everyone has an opinion and it doesn’t matter if it’s based on fact. If all of these men came forward when the abuse was happening, there would have been many more suicides, kids can be brutal and sometimes their parents can be worse. All of us had to deal with bullies and not fitting in, try being the kid who was molested and told someone about it. Aaron was friends with Darrell’s son, I can understand why the need of that friendship would be stronger than the need to report the abuse. It’s hard enough to go through an ordeal like Aaron suffered through for so long, but to go through it completely alone would have been impossible.

    • kay fogleman October 20, 2010

      Mindy you are so right !! I have followed Aaron”s case and I was SHOCKED that he got 9 years .He was raped and abused for all those years and now the judicial system is doing it to him. Shame on Judge Brown and that Beth Norman,they should not be allowed in a court room !! The one statement she made about Aaron killing that “little old man,in his little trailer” Give me a break! He may have been little and old,but he wasn’t a man,HE WAS A MONSTER MOLESTER !!! Get it straight Beth!! As for the” Accountability “JERK ,I can see why he wouldn’t sign his name. I wouldn’t either if I said such untrue rubbish!! I’ll sign my name and be proud for all to know I support Aaron Vargas !!! Kay Fogleman

  2. Rita April 11, 2010

    To anonymous u must not have any children or loved ones this isnt about politics or publicity it sickens me that this even crossed someones mind and children as we go about our lives they unfortunately are being abused i have children so i am greatfull to be aware that one less perpatraitor will my children chance being the victim of so to who ever u are please keep clear of any where children are present you are clearly stating that if my child were to be victimised you are supporting it by the chance to even let it happen! This is a respectable communitty until we thankfully had whoever you are advertising drug dealers ! THAT IS NOT THE ISSUE! THEY ARE EVERYWHERE! God Bless

  3. Douglas Kwan April 11, 2010

    To Anonymous:

    What are you so afraid of in revealing who you are? Be a man, or a woman, and put your name down. Be accountable instead of hiding behind secrecy. If you have been a victim of sexual abuse and even if you haven’t, you should be ashamed of yourself. Aaron was raped and victimized by Mr McNeill for decades. And, think about what you would do if he was to come after your baby? This is the central argument. What would you do if someone who had raped and abused you since you were 11 years old had threatened your new baby? Is this something that you could deal with on a daily basis?

    Before you cast stones, think about being in his shoes for a day, not to mention decades. The fact that a large part of the community supports him, means that he is not a monster. He went to the police, but the Statute of Limitations was expired. Other victims also had the misfortune to have missed the date to get a criminal investigation. As it is now, abusers have many more rights than children. The whole system protects them and continues to abuse the children who have been raped and abused by sexual predators.

    Douglas Kwan

    • Susan April 11, 2010

      There should be no statue of limitation to report sexual abuse. If the evidence is there, the Pedophile should face the consequences. In Aarons case, the evidence is clear. Mulitple Victims. This man was a serial pedophile. There’s no statue of limitation on a serial murderer. Why should there be one for a serial rapist? Thanks for your comment.

  4. Survivor April 11, 2010

    To Anonymous
    So if the law is going to hold Aaron accountable for his actions. Then who is going to hold the law accountable for their actions (or the lack there of ) . Not only was it reported once, but twice (no record of the 1st report with pictures no less ). So the old slogan on the door of every police car across this great land of ours it used to say ” TO PROTECT AND TOO SERVE” I must admit i do not pay that much attention but i know it does not say that any more (at least where i can read it anyway). So I will pay closer attention to that the next time i see a police car in our fair town to make sure. So it would seem to me this does not apply to them at all, or any other form of law enforcement as well as politicians who write these laws. So when you speak of accountability. How can one be accountable in a system that does not have to be accountable for their actions. Let alone all of the thousands of pedos that are roaming free to practice their sick and demented disorder and ruin another life.
    And as for the rest of it Rita and Mindy , covered that.
    May Peace be With You

  5. Susan April 11, 2010

    To Anonymous,

    I think it’s time to let you know somthing.. Imagine yourself a victim of this man, and for years he sexually abused you. Now imagine having a child, and the very person who abused you, is now asking to BABYSIT YOUR CHILD. Imagine yourself not knowing how to protect yourself, your family and the community from this monster, who was never a human being. If the police couldn’t or wouldn’t protect the community from a serial pedophile, Aaron did the only thing he could do. He defended himself. Since when is self defense a crime? Last time I checked, it was still legal. Self defense isn’t murder and I hope everyone understands what this case is really about. A rape victim stopping his attacker, when no one else would. Aaron, sadly, had no choice. There needs to be a clear message here. We are sick of these pedophiles hurting, raping and killing our kids. It’s about time we defend ourselves. Lastly I just want to add, anonymous, you aren’t God nor are you the judge in this case. Even though you would like Aaron in jail, there are many who say he has just been released from hell. Good Luck Aaron. God be with you.

  6. Donica April 11, 2010

    This really breaks my heart. I grew up playing hide and go seek with Aaron and went to school with him and to think for one minute that this was happening to him or anybody in our small town is just sad. I cannot began to understand what emotions or feelings Aaron is experiancing and neither can anyone else unless you have been raped or molested for 11 years or any amount of time. I know i would be more than upset if this happened to me or my child or to anyone i know. This is such a disturbing thing to have to deal with and the only thing we can do is pull together as a community and be supportive. You mention that it is harder to do the right thing and report his abuse. If i remember right abuse had been repoted and how did the police respond? There was none so what now? We cannot began to understand what is going through Aarons head but i do know that he just needs to know that we are behind him. a I trust that the truth is revealing it’s self and that is why things are unfolding the way they are. Aaron is not a murder and has always been a quiet, non confrotational person. I beleive in holding criminals accountable but Aaron is not a criminal he is in need of some counseling and support from his friends and family he has been mentally, and sexually abused for 11 years of his life. Now tell me how you would feel? May Gods blessings continue to be with the Vargas family. Mindy you are amazing keep up the good work.

  7. Trent Foster April 20, 2010

    I just learned some news today.
    That Aron is with a woman and that they have a child!
    And this Boy Scout leader who has molested many of young men , and from what I have heard one of the victims even took his life, had confronted the couple on several occasions. and offeredTo baby sit their child! This has got to be the sickest harassment and twisted sense of humanity, I have ever heard!
    This in itself is the provocation of a threat, the rage that must have scorched the inner soul, in just the thought of a threat to this child, and when and how it may blindly happen, that a predatory sexual deviant could very well strike at any moment, would lead me to sleep deprivation, staying awake at all hours wondering when this threat will again appear, could have very well pushed him over the edge! And to think that Aron used a Black Powder pistol. A curio as opposed to a weapon one would consider real like a SMITH & WESSON 44 magnum. Kind of adds to the scenario that it may have been an attempt to threaten the Cub Scout Master.
    I went to prison for drugs, and I said it then as I say now, that in a case like this when one has reached diminished capacity, from the harm inflicted perpetually , from a pervert and in this case reaching another generation, of the sick bastard jokingly to say involve his child, well if a person is provoked into a crime of passion, we have to way these measures out!
    The real question here is as always when I hear a remark like this,
    What if this happened to you, or your son or daughter? Or what if it was your boy that took his life?
    Here you go talking about a parade down main street, when the fact is poor Aaron is going to have a very tough time showing his face on main street!
    What about all the joking that is going to happen to him, behind his back And as you sit on your soap box and proclaim of that ” legal system chalk full of people who are paid good money to deal with situations like this” Then why did that legal system fail Aaron and others in the first place for over the last 11 tears, again to the point one young man took his life! You see theoretically Mr McNiell has already gotten away with murder!
    Put your foot down, and then take those 2 cents and put them in your ears, for a convict to be struck out on a third strike for something as little as a joint or being drunk, they would have had to committed two strike able violent felonies before hand, I am with you on the three strikes and your out law, and I am with the people who say that sending people to prison for drugs is way off!
    And I fear that the present DA is between a rock and a hard spot, I do not envy her!
    if you were on top of this debacle, he plead no lo contend re for a ten years max!
    Probation is not on the table! But ten nor even two years is way to long for Aron!
    What I am saying is this. If you put a convict in prison under the circumstances that Aron is facing, that is being a victim of child molestation! WILL NOT SERVE JUSTICE and certainly will not be a department of CORRECTIONS or REHABILITATION! It will most CERTAINLY develop another MONSTER!
    He is a prime candidate to become your quintessential hate motivated con and soon to be ex con! Living in your nieghbor hood and community
    First let down by the Cub Scouts, in his mind the judicial system and rightfully so! and then by people like you representing the community with out a question so! Still I agree with you to a limited point, I just don’t feel that this case merits prison, perhaps some county time and then a strict probation with mandated counseling,
    And where did you come up with he is going to be educating the police?
    I would like to read that one or better yet see it done, You can trust me on this one an ex con will never be given the chance to educate the law enforcement,
    I have to wrap this up with one final statement!
    I entered this story not knowing very much about it, and I made a comment for which I apologies to the good people of Fort Bragg!
    But when I hear statements like this “As knowing his family as I do, it was all done for selfish reasons, they could give a crap about anyone else”
    Further bolsters and proves my point it is people like this that shall bitterly confuse law enforcement and poison any community.!
    And further reflects that their uncalled for gossip is nothing more than a sick reflection they shall have to see in the mirror.
    I have given Mindy enough praise, keep up the good work!

  8. karen May 14, 2010

    mindy, thank you for your dedication in starting your non profit. you really are an inspiration. anonymous is lucky you didnt call him or her out by name. i am not so sure that i would have been so generous. maybe they should have accountability for being stupid or probably a molester. stupid anonymous protest too much and no balls. lets put anonymous in that situation and see what “it” says afterwards.

    Aaron is lucky to have you for a sister and God Bless the Vargas family.

  9. Survivor of childhood sex abuse May 17, 2010

    Hey anonymous – people like you who spew their hate often do so from the shadows or under fake names. Hopefully you’ll just stay there. And shut up.

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