Oh The Things Our Handlers Propose To Us

Once again it’s time for us warm up for that sacro­sanct American leisure activity, the trip to the polls! But since this journey always incurs a near-blinding storm of unhappily familiar verbiage and wind, it is our hope that a brief guide may prove useful. So let us set forth and try to disentangle the […]

Ballot Proposition Recommendations

A few years ago when our state budget problems became a little too spiny to sweep under the rug even when the television cameras weren’t on, Governor Meatbag decided to hold a costly “Special Election” to give California voters the opportunity to endorse his solutions to our financial woes, namely the traditional, time-proven plutocratic techniques […]

To Manhattan Island at About 41 Miles Per Hour

Tell your California friends you’re going on vacation, and they’ll smile. Mention that it’s a family vacation, and that smile may falter for a moment. Tell them you’ve booked a trip to New York City, and they’ll say “ah” neutrally and perhaps nod. Tell them you’re going there and back by train, and they’ll gape […]